Giving it a Second Shot–learning From my Mistakes – Dating Question

by Noah
(Los Angeles, California, USA)

Hey coach,

Well, about 6-7 months ago I fell strongly for a woman older than me–she’s 22, I’m 19. With her being the first woman I had attempted to pursue, I feel like I did come off insecure and was not a “man” during our time at coffee and conversations.

I had chased her but eventually gave up because of the mixed feelings and frustration I had received from all the confusion, especially with the age difference. I forgot about her for a couple months then we accidentally met at college and I THINK she showed some interest via Facebook by liking my status two hours after we met–pretty odd after all this time considering she had never like ANY of my previous statuses the months prior?

Regardless if she’s interested or not, I want to give it another shot, and this time the RIGHT way: being confident in myself, having logic over emotion, being “tough” yet respectful.

I personally don’t think it is a bad idea–I have nothing to lose–but wondered what you thought considering your valuable experience and knowledge.

From one man to another,
Noah.



Comments for
Giving it a Second Shot–learning From my Mistakes – Dating Question

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Taking another shot at dating
by: Dave Anan

It is so good to summon your confidence and take a second shot at dating. I think you are on the right path, you will definitely hit broad-way anytime soon.

You realized that your attitude and character effects your relationship directly, you also acknowledged your initial mistake and probably learned to take the right and positive approach

Tell me – how do you intend going about it??

what I plan on doing
by: Noah

Before I start, thank you buddy for the quick response! I appreciate your help a lot… The articles on your site have helped me a lot as I began researching and they have had a great impact on me as I’m sure it as on others as well. For that, I thank you man!

Well, what am I going to do? First off, I’m going to play it cool. During the months prior, I ALLOWED myself to get too crazy over her and because of that I pretty much did and said stupid things that I shouldn’t have–my emotions overcame my logic. Second, I’m going to be more flirty with her and every other girl I intend to pursue–when looking back at my experience with her I could see I was “boring” most TIMES but the times I was flirty, such as the way I asked her for coffee in a text, it worked very well to my suprise. As of now, I am leaning towards sending her a text–but not just a simple “hi,” but something out of the ordinary/humourous but not stupid and work it through the text to MAYBE a phone conversation. After seeing how she responds through the texting and possible phone conversation, then I will try to arrange a time for us to hangout during a school break or outside of school.

For now, that is all that comes to mind. Any constructive criticism is appreciated! I want to be able to know what I’m doing with the ladies.

Thanks buddy,
Noah.

Giving a second shot to dating
by: Dave Anan

Thanks for your words of encouragement I have been getting lots of that recently, I just hope to help lots of guys succeed with their dream girlfriend, I know it is do-able with determination, the right attitude and approach – more is on the way.

I decided to allow those words as testimonial on my homepage, you can see it at the right column, I hope you are OK with it.

If you keep going like this, you will eventually build a lasting relationship with any girl of your choice, at some point you will become very comfortable with women and talk to them easily, you will lose all the fears you used to have and just wonder how you did it.

Have you seen Effective Communication – How to Talk to Girls

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